The Wrong Form

I have the power to build or destroy. Do you want me to leave it as it is and let it slowly grow old. Like my body, I got to keep giving it the nutrition and exercise it needs or else it will shrivel up and die. Why would I want to do that in another form? I need to feed this. I take the proverb into consideration and question how I form the future through my actions, words, silence, and thoughts. I'll figure the good from the bad and the good from the evil. Some things make us and some things break us to make a better us. I want to be the best I can, but the breaking hurts. Tear drops show my sincerity. The pain that's tearing me apart doesn't feel necessary. I'm madder at myself than anybody else. "Come on man, why did you do a stupid thing like that?" Frustration boils over and forms a fist. I wonder if it's you. Don't drag your problems over me. Then I wonder if I'm getting off track cause I want to blame you. You, you, you. That's what it keeps coming back to. We want different things. I want my way and your way. Is there a balance I can have? What have I made this into? I see a formation and it looks a lot like you. - JDM

Itch

Thurday morning I went to help out at my church's rummage sale. I've heard that that went pretty swell. Praise the Lord!
Friday's highlight was going paint balling with the youth guys. The down side was that there was mosquitos with a deadly thirst for blood taking about a pint of mine. lol. I think I got three times as much bites as I did hit by any paintballs.
Today's( Saturday) main event was going to the church's guys brunch at Silver Creek Metro Park where we had food, corn hole, volleyball, and all of us took a hike. Nice fun. Now I'm just hanging around home enjoying the peace and quiet of a Saturday evening.
One thing about the past three days is I've fallen asleep on our couch. Not sure what it is all about but it just happens.

Movie Adventure

The story of my movie adventure:
"It's like America, just South." - quote from Up. LOL
I believe it started last week sometime when I was talking to Meg. I said I wanted to go see the new Pixar movie Up and Meg came up with this idea of setting up an event on Facebook. She did so and invited everyone that both of us knew. We got a few responses, a few yes', some no's, and several maybe's. So I thought * hey, this is good. This could be really fun having a group of friends going to the movies*.
Then yesterday I was reminded of the movie event which was scheduled for today. I thought well maybe we won't have a lot of being going, but it will still be fun. I talked to Pam a couple times saying maybe she could go then maybe she couldn't, finally getting that she couldn't. I chatted with Meg and found out that she wouldn't even be going. I thought *Hmm? Should I even try going to the movie by myself?* lol.
Do not fret. This story has a happy ending. Ha. I called up Bryan, a scout that doesn't live far from the theatre, and asked him if he wanted to go see the movie. He agreed. Score!!
Another funny thing was when I got to the theatre, I looked at the schedule and seen that the movie didn't start for another half hour. Opps. Somehow the schedule on the website I looked at yesterday was a little off. No harm, Bryan and I just played air hockey and an arcade game to fill in time. :)

Sooo

This weekend was good and tiring. I think I slept for 10 hours last night. Of course it was good and lots of fun, just I NEED sleep. If I miss an hour or something it can totally change things. LOL. I'm thinking of camp which is less than a month away. I hope I get enough sleep or I just might shut down. This reminds me to go study....

Saturday nite

Its Saturday nite( almost sunday in a few minutes) and I'm really... happy, joyful, excited.... could i even say shiny. lol. ( i dont kno if thats in the right context)
Today, I had my Eagle Scout Court of Honor. I say it went really good. People are saying it did. Glad for everyone that was there and everyone that made it possible.
Also, my siblings are all home so that's really cool. Played catch with my bros this evening. Enjoying being couch potatoes together watching movies like Paul Blart:Mall Cop and Hotel for Dogs.
Got off the phone about an hour ago with a friend from camp that I don't get to talk to much. Totally cool.
I am tired. Ha. So what's new. w/e. I got pretty much just positive things to say. Can't complain. God is good... All the time.

Survey says...

Beginners...
my name is: Jonathan McConkey
this morning i was: sleeping till 9
im afraid of: fear
i dream about: the future
been in love: ha i guess.. idk
cried when someone died: yes
lied: yesf
lowers or candy: i like candy better but its not healthy
scruff or clean shaven: depends mostly clean
tall or short: im short
With The Opposite Sex...
what do you notice first?: maybe clothes..
last person you slow danced with:no one
worst question to ask: does this make me look fat lol
Who...
makes you laugh the most?: no one in particular
makes you smile: about everyone
gives you a funny feeling when you see them: ha im sure theres some
is easier to talk to: boys or girls?: not sure
Do You Ever...
sit on the internet waiting for someone special to IM you?: ha
save AIM conversations?: no
wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: no
cry because of something someone has said: no
pray?: yes
Have You Ever...
fallen for your best friend? sure
rejected someone: ohh yes
cheated on someone: no
been cheated on: no
done something you regretted: everyone has
wanted to die: who hasnt
Who Was The Last Person...
you talked to on the phone: rochelle
hugged: kayla lol
you instant messaged: bryan
you laughed with: someone at church
Do You...
color your hair: no
ever get off the computer: yes
habla espanol: ( speaks spanish)... little
sprechen sie deutsches: haha
fight with your parents: not really
have friends you've lost touch with: sure
feel happy?:yes
wish you could fly away.. far, far away?: randomly
believe in God?: yes
could you live without the computer?:idk
what's your favorite candy?: ohh like chocolate
whats your favorite fruit?: strawberries
sunrise or sunset?: not sure both are cool
what hurts the most? physical pain or emotional pain? ha..
trust others way too easily?: not sure
are your fingers cold?: no
coke or pepsi: more pepsi
Final Questions...
I want: to be better
I wish: everything works out
I love: everyone
I miss: some
I fear: things in the dark
I hear: the computer hum
I smell: nothing really
I wonder: how the future will unfold

Improvement

You know those times when you just want to do better. You want to improve, but there is a constant struggle. The Apostle Paul talked about doing what he didn't want to do and it's still facing us today. I felt that way the other day and it sorta came out like this...


I feel bad as soon as I do it, as soon as I say it. The guilt comes and swallows me up. You say it's okay and I'm really not a jerk, but I don't always agree. I'm waiting for the sun while it's raining and you say the weather is quite nice. I can do way better. I don't want to ever cause one drop of doubt in your mind that I love you and want the best for you. I want you to be happy. I wish I could do more for you. When someone has been so good to you and is a positive aspect of your life they deserve it. You deserve the best I can pour out. I know there is better in me. I may not be the worst guy out there, but there is always room for improvement. I'm just saying I may not be a jerk I just want to treat you better. - JDM

Not much

There is not too much to report.
Summer is kicking in with its lazy habits.
I love to sleep in, just mosey around, watch movies, and spend time on the computer.
Yesterday was pretty much that, except Joshua and I went to Wildcat Ranch( a local
friend's camp) that we've gone to a couple years. What we've done last year and this
year is just go for the last nite to see the crowd and watch skits they've made up. They
always bring a few laughs and a smile to my face.

trials

My Pastor last Sunday morning spoke about the truth of trials( I Thes. 3:3-4) And just the other day I came across this other thing about trials, maybe God is saying something. lol. " We can use adversity for gain. We need to learn from trials—to grow from the experience and be made better (James 1:2-3). Sometimes we should “escape” trials/temptation (1 Corinthians 10:13). Sometimes we should “flee” (Matthew 10:23). And at other times, trials are to be confronted and endured (2 Thessalonians 1:4; 2 Timothy 4:5; Hebrews 12:7). We must face the things that challenge us and grow in virtue because of the challenge."

Spiders

This past weekend guys( three adults and eight boys) from my church went camping. On Friday we left the church at 4 and got to our camping spot around 7. Set up camp, started cooking, hung out, Denver the youth leader spoke a little, and we just enjoyed the outdoors with the guys.

Saturday, We first got up and ate breakfast. Then Denver spoke to us a little more to be men of integrity( I really enjoyed it). At one point that morning a couple of us went down to the pond and tyler slipped hitting his butt on the dock and only getting his legs wet to his knees. We tore down camp and went all over Hocking Hills hiking and seeing the great wonders of Creation. We even happened to see a couple snakes which was awesome. Us guys stopped at the one place to eat lunch with some tasty hot dogs, chips, peanuts and beans. On our way back home we stopped at Taco Bell!!( I'll just leave it up to ur imagination what the van smelled like the rest of the way.lol.)

Friday night around the campfire, Jamie started talking about Camel Spiders. Saying these spiders which came from over seas in the desert were vicious insects that ate camels along with saying other funny, crazy nonesense about them. So Camels spiders were the joke the rest of the weekend. This interested me so I just had to look 'em up. The scary thing is these are actual poisionous spiders, but thankfully they are not as wild as Jamie said they were.

I thought I would post some myths and facts about camel spiders.

Myths:
1. Camel spiders can move at speeds over 30 MPH, screaming while they run. 2. Camel spiders can be as large as a frisbee. 3. Camel spiders venom is an anesthetic that numbs their prey. 4. Camel spiders can jump three feet high. 5. Camel spiders get their name because they eat the stomachs of camels. 6. They eat or gnaw on people while they sleep. Due to the numbing effect of their venom, the victim is unaware until they awake.

Facts:

Camel spiders top speed is 10 mph. Which is very fast for a such a small creature..
Size: Up to 8 inches, although many report larger.
They are called camel spiders because they live in the desert.

Gates of Hell

Something from Bible Study last night: Pastor was talking about making sure we have God's blessing and will in and on our lives. We cannot be fooled that everything in life will be peaches and cream when Christ is our Savior though. Jesus said He came to bring division and a sword. There is a constant battle and only through struggle will we someday find rest.

Ephesians 6:12 KJV
"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."

Storm the Gates of Hell by Demon Hunter

Broken teeth, a shattered jaw
Ten to one, behold my God
Wicked sons of Heaven’s loss
Raise your own inverted cross
Kings of earth, iron first
Serve the sacred you dismissed
Stand before your final day
Choke on every line you pray
Raise your glass to death
Not one second left
Wake the lifeless, die to fight this
Stand beside me, storm the gates of Hell
Wake the lifeless, die to fight this
Stand beside me, storm the gates of Hell
Storm the gates of Hell
Coward’s heart, a serpent’s tongue
Stand to face what you’ve outrun
Fear of death, fear of pain
Bound to all you took in vain
No more lies, no regrets
Sever ties and hollow debt
Open eyes, live to learn
Or watch your blessed temple burn
Raise your glass to death
Not one second left
Wake the lifeless, die to fight this
Stand beside me, storm the gates of Hell
Wake the lifeless, die to fight this
Stand beside me, storm the gates of Hell
Storm the gates of Hell

Anger

"Anger is the feeling that makes your mouth work faster than your mind." - Evan Esar

Psalm

Among the gods there is none like You.You alone are God. You alone are my God. The evil attack me on every side. Through it all I will praise my gracious God. You are my God. Please guard my life and save me from the depths of the ruthless. I call to You, God, every day. I am confident that it comes to your throne. My King and my God, I will worship You in my life everyday of my life. The God of the universe who created all things, You are the only One who can make me blameless. God Almighty, when my heart is full of trouble I will be thankful your love stands forever. I will praise You for your faithfulness. You are more awesome than any other living being. You have made me alive. Raising me from the dead. Waking me from my sleep.