You know those times when you just want to do better. You want to improve, but there is a constant struggle. The Apostle Paul talked about doing what he didn't want to do and it's still facing us today. I felt that way the other day and it sorta came out like this...
I feel bad as soon as I do it, as soon as I say it. The guilt comes and swallows me up. You say it's okay and I'm really not a jerk, but I don't always agree. I'm waiting for the sun while it's raining and you say the weather is quite nice. I can do way better. I don't want to ever cause one drop of doubt in your mind that I love you and want the best for you. I want you to be happy. I wish I could do more for you. When someone has been so good to you and is a positive aspect of your life they deserve it. You deserve the best I can pour out. I know there is better in me. I may not be the worst guy out there, but there is always room for improvement. I'm just saying I may not be a jerk I just want to treat you better. - JDM
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